Have you noticed that everyone everywhere is using a brand-new catch phrase? From Valley Girls and geeky gamers to housewives and clergy, everybody is using the phrase “In this economy,” so often that it’s closing in on the perennial favorite “Um.”
The most important thing I’ve noticed is that using this phrase can make you seem very current and informed, even if whatever trails the phrase is completely unrelated to anything economic. And while I am constantly working on being current and informed, I have come up with some important facts that I think you should note:
In this economy, it’s hard to choose between strawberries and caramel as an ice cream topping.
In this economy, it’s smart to return your library books on time.
In this economy, wearing ankle socks with sandals is a poor fashion choice.
In this economy, back scratches are often as enjoyable as back rubs.
In this economy, elbows are often home to dry, rough patches of skin.
In this economy, flossing is an important way to prevent tooth decay.
In this economy, bananas taste great when sliced in cold cereal.
In this economy, toenail fungus is an embarrassing and hard-to-treat condition.
In this economy, reading bedtime stories to your children can be quality bonding time.
In this economy, people think that Brad leaving Jennifer for Angelina was a terrible thing to do.
In this economy, the days are shorter in winter than in summer.
In this economy, iCarly is one of the funniest tween shows on TV.
In this economy, playing with matches in a dry field of wheat is a dangerous and sometimes deadly plan.
In this economy, getting the recommended amount of sleep is important.
In this economy, Sharpies are a marvelous and effective way to mark things permanently.
In this economy, washing your hands after using the restroom and before returning to work is required by state law.
In this economy, bean burritos are a healthy and satisfying lunch option.
See how informed and current I sound?
Now, please tell me what you’ve learned in this economy….
