I’m about to give you the best neighbor gift idea of the holidays. It’s simple, inexpensive, colorful, fat-free, and nobody has to find a place to hang it on the wall.
I received this very recipe as a gift from a neighbor probably seven or eight years ago and have been re-creating it ever since. As soon as the autumn chill sets in, I get out my saucepan and grab these simple ingredients from the counter and cupboards.
Ingredients:
A few slices of lemon
A few slices of orange
One or two cinnamon sticks
One bay leaf
A trickle of whole cloves
A few cranberries (Totally optional. It adds some cute color.)
Step 1: Slice up a lemon and an orange.
Step 2: Add your cinnamon sticks, whole cloves, and a bay leaf.
Step 3: Put everything in a saucepan and fill it with water. Set the pan on a warm stove and let this simmer. Your home will be filled with a wonderful sweet and spicy aroma, and your neighbors will think that you are a freaking awesome cook just from the fumes that waft into their open windows.
Of course, if you are giving this as a gift or favor, skip Step 3 and simply tie all of this up in a cute cellophane bag with a tag. But please—FOR THE LOVE OF CHRISTMAS—don’t write something dorky on the tag like, ORANGE you glad the holidays are here? or, Just wanted to SPICE up your holidays or, A sweet and spicy holiday stew for someone sweet and spicy like you! The only thing worse is when the key words are “put in quotation marks” so that everybody “gets the joke” because I guess everybody thinks their neighbors are “below average” or something.
As you can see, we’ve stumbled upon my worst holiday pet peeve: annoying word play on cheap gifts. Please don’t try to disguise your cheap gift with some cute-sy wording. Don’t kid yourself; everybody knows you only spent seventy-nine cents on the gift. That’s all they spent on yours. Cheap gifts are fine. Dorky tags are not. Are you listening, Universe?
How about something like this: “[Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays/Happy Hannukah] from the [YOUR LAST NAME HERE] family”
SEE HOW EASY THAT WAS?
Sheesh.
I actually love that I work in an office where I don’t have to do this and since I don’t know my neighbors I don’t worry about it there either. Although instead I have to give my secretary a bonus and pass out lots of bonus money to the doormen and other people working in my building, I wonder how they would react to a baggie of oranges and cinnamon sticks this year . . .
Yes, ma’am. And also, don’t put an apostrophe in your last name. (p.s. I think I can smell that through the computer and it smells GOOD.)
“Orange” you glad you ain’t gettin’ a Christmas present from me. I do want your holiday to be “souper”, and I usually do “rise” to the occasion and “chews” a gift that will make my friends “jolly”. But lets see if I ever “wisk” you a Merry “Kiss”mas again. This year, my dear, you are gettin’ “muffin” for Christmas.
“hugs” and “kisses”
DeAnn
I’m sure I’ve been guilty. It’s just that Christmases past seem a long time ago and I can’t honestly remember if I’ve outgrown the word play thing. I would hate to think my gift was the object of mockery. A rose is a rose is a rose, and that little citrus medley smells so good, forget about the tag and enjoy! Even cheap gifts take thought and time to prepare. So go easy on us ordinary souls who don’t measure up to you sophisticates. We have peelings, too.
Touche, DeAnn, touche.
This is one of those gifts that I love I enjoy the smell and the moment and it brings back happy memories and I don’t have to store it or hang it on the wall or on the door.
Dad